got a lil free time on monday like this, then decided to open wordpress and write a few. i dedicate this post to my one and only partner of life, my husband. 

first time we met, we just a stranger to each other in a strange place, didn’t notice who is he, i just enjoyed being surrounded with people who have the same hobby like me. 

then everything turned out unexpectedly, God did that to us. i didn’t even had the chance to think what is happening at that time. things change, feelings change, so smoothly, beyond my imagination. i feel so comfort being around him, being around someone stranger out of nowhere. can you imagine if God said yes, nothing can stop.

as time goes by, i realize why is this all happened to me. 

me is a fifth daughter of my family, i dont have brother. my mom is 40 years old when she gave birth to me, my youngest sister is 9 years older than me, and my eldest sister is 15 years older than me.  me and my whole family have a significant gap of era. so i feel like an only daughter in the family, bcos my sisters already grown up when i was there. back then when i was kid-teenager-before married, sometimes it’s good to be in a family like that and manytimes i feel lonely. had to solve my problems by myself all the time coz i feel like i don’t have anyone in the family that i can talk to when i needed. my parents, yeah they just do what a common parents should do, no more,and what about friends? yess of course i have friends but idk i just don’t feel right to tell my friends about my very personal things till now. 

a few times i had been in a relationship, i acted like a child seeking for attention too much, and maybe it made the relationship broken, coz maybe they think it was disgusting to have a girlfriend who always clinging on to you, who always ask for your time days and nights. who always get angry when you dont get what she wants. i know it was wrong, but i have reasons why i did that, because i need them, because i dont wanna feel lonely like before i met them. because i was happy to finally have someone i can talk to when i needed. thats it. i didn’t need nothing else but their time. as simple as that. but maybe they just dont get me right. 

now, everything came just like what i wish for, i got brother, soulmate, bestfriend, famiily, everything i really wanted in a man. 

but it didn’t an easy journey for us, tho, before finally we get married. 

i speak too much he speaks too little. i find it easy to express my feelings, he find it so difficult just to say what he wanted to say. many times we got hardtime because of that. and he always calm me down when sh*t happened in our relationship. he patiently never failed to keep me in his arms  whatever happens, no matter how hard i am to handle, because he knows i love him so much. 

believe it, everything will make perfect sense in the right time, be strong and have faith in God. 

happy birthday my dear husband. (actually it’s June 4th :p) i wish you all the good in Dunya and Akhirah. Aamiin aamiin Ya Robbal’alamin. 



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